First real weekend with my husband and another wedding

I finally got a real taste of married life this weekend. Friday night I was supposed to go to the rehearsal for my friend's wedding on Saturday. I called her 3 times and sent her a text, she never responded. So I didn't go. She never even told me the correct time. TheCount was like you are being trifling, I still didn't go. Saturday morning we were up pretty early so I decided we should finally get some groceries for the house. We went to W.alMa.rt first then the vitamin shoppe to get my shampoo and scalp treatments then to Trader Joe's but they didn't have what I needed. Finally we made our way over to Giant, I had my list of all the sales and everything. We had a lot of fun together. Since I was in a wedding that night and we were going to church in the morning we decided to spend the night at my parent's house. I was supposed to meet at the hotel at 5:30 to get ready for the wedding at 7:30, yeahhhhhh I wasn't there, lol. When I got to the hotel at 6, I saw the bride on the phone cussing somebody out. I was like oookkkkkkkk, and ran over to do damage control. It was the beginning of a very interesting wedding.

Her wedding was very very interesting. Let's start with the good. The reception was beautifully decorated and the food was aaammmmaazzziiiinngggg. For the appetizer each person had HALF A PINEAPPLE on their plate with fruit on the inside. It was beautiful and tasty! So tasty that I kept eating fruit I was allergic to :) I had crabcakes but I hear the chicken and beef meals were equally as good. From what people told me, the bartender was also amazing, people were raving about their drinks. Now on to the rest of this "event."

First of all the groom cursed the bride's 13 year old sister out and threatened to cancel the wedding all because she didn't let him take a shower in the room all the bridesmaids were getting dressed. Yes, he is as jerky as he sounds. Anyway, we get ready and walk next door to where the wedding will be. I help her get in her dress, which the lady made too tight. This chick is a size freaking 2, and the seamstress had to take that in, but she took in a bit too much, she couldn't even sit down. Halfway through the reception I had to sneak behind her chair and undo her corset snaps and zip it back up.

The music for the ceremony was verryyy interesting. The groomsmen walked in to some song talking bout "Hi, my name is Charlie, and I'm a virgo..." and some other foolishness. We walked into a song from Dreamgirls, the flower girl walked into "Beauty is her name," and I forget what the bride walked in to. Want to know what their first dance was? I bet you'll never guess what their first dance was. "Me and Mrs. Jones," yes the song about having an affair. Just because the title has your name in it does not mean you should ignore the song content.

The groomsmen were ummmmmm very very interesting. As we met up to leave out of the ceremony we had to link arms. This is what followed:
Groomsman: I missed you last night at rehearsal.
Me: yeahhh
GM: looking at my ring oh, I see I'm too late
Me: Oh yeah, about 2 weeks late
GM: Dammmnnnnn, well they say you supposed to have a husband and a boyfriend.
Me: Ummm they didn't say that to me
GM: Well can I be your husband for the night?
Me: nervous laughter

As we go trough the night talking, since I had to sit next to him.
Me: No thank you, I don't drink
GM: Did you have a bad experience with alcohol or something?
Me: No, I just don't drink
GM: Does your husband drink?
Me: No
GM: Would you have married him if he did
Me: No, I wouldn't have dated him if he did
GM: So I would have had a chance if I didn't drink?
Me: Well if you didn't drink, smoke, or curse. And if I wasn't married and....
GM: Dammmnnn, ok. Umm has anybody ever called you bourgeois?
Me: Hey, I've heard worse.

Y'all this dude tried everything in his power to get me to sleep with him. His ole funky jacked up teeth old behind! Ugghhhhh.

But the best part of the wedding was the fight. Yes the fight. Over the darn bouquet. Between my old boss and some lady. Y'all they would not let go. Spinning around snatching. They had to do a tie breaker. And the other lady actually pouted because she lost! I thought she was going to cry. My boss came over afterward and said, "I was going to beat her motherf***ing @ss if she didn't let that d**n thing down." Oh if you could have seen it. And people have the nerve to ask why I didn't do a bouquet and garter toss at my wedding!

There's more foolishess, but that's all for now. I've made our lunches for tomorrow and now I have to put my husband to sleep :) AND PSERENDIPITY WHERE ARE MY PICTURES?

Too Much Info Friday

Yesterday Pink asked if we got sick in Mexico. Let's just say one of us spent a whole day on the toilet and it was not me! You would have thought somebody died in there! While I'm on TMI Imight as well keep going, lol.

My mom came over yesterday to wait for the Comcast guy. We were on the phone together and she was begging to see the honeymoon pictures. I already told her "mommy, just wait, it's some inappropriate stuff on there." She kept on saying that I'm married now and nothing is inappropriate. I said time and time again mommy you don't need to see all of the pictures. But since she kept begging I told her how to get to them on the computer. It was so funny to hear her reaction. First she saw the one with me sitting in the tub, "ohh wow that's a lot of bubbles" then she saw the next series of pictures with us wearing the bubbles as clothes,"oh my!" Then she saw the one where I was trying to take a picture of TheCount drying off. Thank goodness his towel was covering his man parts! My mom was like "ummm don't think I should have seen that one!" Next was TheCount trying to get me back by taking pictures of me on the toilet, those were funny. Then she got to some pictures of me posing in a short robe, with nothing under it. My mom was like "ohhh what a relief, I thought you were a prude. I felt sorry for TheCount, I thought he was going to have to miss out on all sorts of sexual fun because he married my prude daughter. Now I know you can have SOME fun." I was like maaaaaaaaa! Ugggh she is so embarassing.

Things I learned on my honeymoon

I need to use SPF 194. I got dark quick! One day after we got out of the pool and I took my swimsuit off TheCount pointed at my butt and cracked up laughing. The color difference was ridiculous. So this is the crispy view of TM and Count.



I am greedy and I love me some chips and salsa. There are so many pictures of me chewing while reaching for more food it's ridiculous....and unattractive!




I can make a mean bubble bath! The other thing I learned was that TheCount and I will never be able to fit in a regular bath tub together. We tried at the airport hotel and it was a disaster. I couldn't even sit down! Thankfully this resort had a jacuzzi so I poured and poured and poured. Then we had a bubble fashion show....but y'all can't see all that!




When TheCount and I get more established I'm flying Blanca, our maid from the resort, into this country so she can keep our house in order. Whenever TheCount and I finally got out of bed she would come clean the ridiculous mess. Then every evening she came to turn down the bed and give us chocolates.

I don't listen during tours. The man spent so long talking bout these daggon archs and neither one of us know what they represent! But thanks to the nice couple that took our picture. There is a closer one in but TheCount saw me and I had to tell him I didn't show his face!

Me no likey Tequila...or any alcohol for that matter. We went to the place where they make tequila and they had so many different kinds! They even gave tastings that seemed to last forever. The entire time in Mexico I had 2 sips of alcohol, lol. But this picture was still cool.

Just posted this one so I could say.....I sure am cute! LOL But the mountains really were beautiful.

I cannot take pictures of us. I'm really just not that good at it!

Alright, it's time for me to spend some time with my husband! I'll have more later :)

Sorry

I had the best intentions...honest! I was going to finish posting the pictures and things but I am beat. I spent all evening building a dresser for the bedroom putting away clothes, organizing the bathroom, doing laundry, and cleaning the apartment. I refuse to have my husband to come back to the same chaos that he left on Sunday. The pictures are coming I promise! On a brighter note, I pick up my baby from the airport at 5:30p.m. today! Yayyyyyy He'll be surprised at what I've done. The posts are coming I promise but tonight I still have to vacuum, lay out my clothes, do my hair, and shower. And figure out why of all this stuff I have why I can't find a tube of mascara!

I'm Bacckkkkkkkkk and I'm better than ever!

I am back from my honeymoon :) Thank you to everybody that stopped by with well wishes and a special thank you to Pserendipity that dedicated a whole blog post to me! I was cheesing and telling folks and they looked at me like, sooooo what? Go to bed, you're getting married in the morning, lol!

I'm just putting up a few pictures today but throughout the week look for some more detailed posts. I have lots of time on my hands because my husband is in St. Louis for work this week and I'm at home, all alone, already :( My parents won't let me come stay with them for the week, how mean is that! For 23 years I lived with those folks and within one week of getting married I'm banned? How rude! I should call their house at 3am fake crying, then they'll let me come back home! Anyway here is a sample of my one of a kind wedding. The first picture is us running out of the church lol. Notice the shoes on the guys, yepyep, those are chucks. The second and third pictures are us being our silly selves.



Shades and chucks imagine I know some of the older traditional people were like what the heck is going on here!



I just knew the pastor was gonna come and tell us to get down! LOL but he sat in his car and watched us have yet another photo shoot outside of his church. Thanks Pastor T!
Our internet is acting soooo janky right now. It has taken me hours to make a facebook album and my tv isn't even working right. I hope I can get the posts together for the rest of the week. I'm sitting in this apartment with the worlds slowest internet, our cable won't work, AND the washing machine has decided to stop working! When TheCount leaves this place goes crazy!

I'm spending my day reading your blogs! Have a great Monday!

Today is the first day of the best days of my life!

Today I am getting married. I scheduled this post 2 weeks ago, I'm not actually blogging on my wedding day (Facebook, maybe). I have been waiting to marry TheCount since I was 13. 10 years later, it's happening. Within the first 2 weeks of us dating, he informed me that I would be his wife. I never doubted his word for one second. At 17, I knew the dude I was dating would be the dude for me forever. Nobody around us thought we were serious, they doubted we would make it through me going off to college while he stayed home. We made it. Everybody thought things would get old and we would get bored when we transferred to be at the same college. They were wrong. When his brother passed away, they thought it would change us. The pain would be too much and we wouldn't make it through. We did. When his daddy passed away a year and a half later people were praying that we would hold on, that we would make it. That I would be strong for him, help him get through. I did. We have been through a lot in the last 5 1/2 years of dating and through the ups and downs, God held us in his hands and protected and preserved us.

Undoubtedly I am excited about the years to come. Buying a house, traveling, having children, retiring, traveling more. I plan to grow old with my true love. God really outdid Himself with this one. It makes me happy to know that as he was forming the world and ordering my steps, that he ordained this day. He knew that October 11, 2008 at 1:00 p.m. I would be getting married to one of his best creations. Can you imagine? God loves us so much, and He really only wants the best for us. I'm glad I stuck around to receive it.

The next time we talk, I'll me a married woman. Fresh from my honeymoon in Mexico and getting used to being a wife. I'm so excited and I know that the best is yet to come!

Dude, I'm getting married tomorrow!

Mama TM told MamaCount off at the rehearsal last night. Yeahhh, funny stuff. MamaCount called TheCount whining afterward then he talked some sense into her and then she called my mom and apologized. She basically made fun of a song that my mom chose to walk down to. Then MamaTM got kind of buck and was like, "yeah that would be fine if your daughter was getting married, but clearly she's not." Hahahahaha, she won't tell me what else she said.

The lady that I chose to do my makeup did it last night before rehearsal. I hated it. I cried. So my mom was like I'll call her and tell her we can't afford it and get my cousin to do it. Sounds like a plan, now I can use the colors I told her to use in the first place!

My sister comes in a few hours!!!!!!!!!!!!Whooohooooo, she's coming to pick me up from the hair salon then we are going to see our friend that just had a baby then we are going to mac so I can get some foundation. I went looking yesterday but the girl was soooo rude that I walked away. My friend was like, "oh she must not know that's not how you talk to the bride!" So I'll get my rude sistah up there and I will get some service!

I had a few bridezilla moments last night because I was so frustrated about the makeup. I told my cousin to shut up and go sit in the back room and do what I told her to do and I told my dad to shut up or I will slap him. I felt bad, I need to apologize. At the rehearsal dinner one of the groomsmen tried to get loud with him. Shoooottttt, the neck rolling and "you wanna try me?" question made him jump, literally. Nobody expected that out of me. I laughed it off so people would think I was joking because I didn't expect it to come out that mean. Oh well, I've been pretty good I'll say. Off to bed now I have a 9:30 relaxer, rinse, weave appointment.