I really want some bacon

Yo body. We're not going to do this. You can stop feeling like crap, we won't be getting sick. Thank you in advance for complying.

 

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Car Wants: Heated leather seats, separately controlled heat/air for driver and passenger. Yep that's about it. Car will not tolerates: red or green vehicles. Don't know why, but I just don't like red or green cars, I'm strange like that.

 

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My coworker ran up on this girl in the store this weekend thinking she was me. It wasn't me- it was his niece. He was so embarrassed but he keeps telling me we look just alike, even down to our acne- sigh, I gotta get this skin clear.

 

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We're supposed to be test driving cars tonight. TheCount still wants a Pacifica, I want a Mountaineer. There are other vehicles that we like, but they aren't in our price range. Of course God may do something crazy and miraculous so we'll see what happens.

 

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I'm really contemplating a January 2 big chop. I'm thinking long and hard on it. TheCount wants me to get locks, I'm 2 seconds from telling him to get out my hair and stop making suggestions. I don't want locks, I want big crazy hair that will make my momma mad and make me my aunt's favorite.  I have plans man.

 

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My daddy has started making his own beer. Why oh why does this man keep telling TheCount and I about it? We don't care daddy, we don't drink! We don't drink wine, we don't drink liquor, we don't drink beer, we don't drink alcohol period!!!!!!!! I'm not going to taste a bottle of basement beer.

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Last year at work, we played a game where we had an anonymous gift exchange. Wouldn't you know the gift I picked was alcohol. Everybody in the room was all mad, they were like, "she don't even drink! Somebody steal her gift." I'm glad somebody stole it because I wouldn't have known what to do with it.

 

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I think I know what I'm getting my blog secret santa person ;)