PotNoLuck luncheon

I didn't have time to do my Thanksgiving picture post yet, so I'll have that for tomorrow. I will keep this one food themed though. My department is having a potluck gift exchange next week. I love all things Christmas and I love all things food. EXCEPT potlucks! No sir, I am not a fan of the potluck. I love cooking and have no problem bringing something to share, but I do have a problem with other people cooking and bringing something to share. Why? Because not everybody has my same standards. I used to work with a woman with 4 inch acrylic nails. She was always offering some food or reaching into my food bag and I wouldn't touch anything she did. Why? Cuz not only were her nails super long she was very very overweight and I couldn't understand how she wiped her bottom without all that nastiness getting trapped under her nails. That is gross, can't do it. I thought working here would be different but then my officemate up and informs me of this:

 

 

She had some plumbing issues in her townhome the other week. Her toilet and shower started bubbling and they filled up with pee and poop. You get that? All of her neighbors pee and poop filled up her toilet and bathtub. So much so that it overflowed. And leaked down into the kitchen. Into the sink. Where she had dishes! It did this on Sunday, they waited a while to see if it would rectify itself, it didn't, so they called the plumber. The plumber came out on Monday and fixed it and then it happened again Monday night and another plumber came out Tuesday to fix it. There are 2million things wrong with this story, but the main things are: 1. How in the heck did your family sleep in a house filled with other people's waste. Can you imagine that smell? 2. That ish leaked through your ceiling. Did you get somebody in there to treat that? 3. This heifer said "I used a whole bottle of bleach cleaning up. I bleached the bathroom, the sink, and the dishes." Hold the heck up. You bleached the dishes? Did you mean to say you burned the dishes and then bleached the ashes? How can you eat on some dishes that were covered in YOUR NEIGHBORS WASTE! You are nasty. {another coworker and I had a field day reenacting scenes from those 3 days in her life. We imagined poop coming out of the shower head while bathing, her bad @ss daughter playing in it, and what her house will smell like next month when the stuff that leaked through her ceiling molds and starts stinking up the place}

 

Anyway, because of stories like that from coworkers, I aint eating nothing you cook! Bleached the dishes smh.

 

Now I'm torn. I guess I'll go and eat my dish a find out what people I trust made and eat that. I just don't want to offend anybody by not eating their dish cuz people always be asking "ohh did you try what I made?" I've got my standard excuse ready, "no, I'm deathly allergic!"