Wednesday, September 2, 2009

What You Said?

I have work out the wazoo to do today, thanks to my laziness last week, so this will be brief. Here is a quick compilation of quotes from the past few days. The title is not courtesy of moi, but my sister's best friend says that all the time, I don't think she knows it's supposed to be, "what did you say?"
OldToothlessManOnACane: Dang girl, you know you fine. What's yo name?
Me: Jennifer
OldToothlessManOnACane: I know that's right
Me: Actually it's not walks away briskly laughing at my wit and quick thinking cuz my name sure ain't Jennifer
Daddy: TM, your car sounds horrible. I was scared to drive it. You better get it in the shop right now, it sounds like the transmission. It's probably gonna cost you a couple thousand dollars. Don't drive it over 40 mph. If I were you I wouldn't even drive it home tonight.
Me: Ummhmmm, ok daddy drives 75mph the whole way home
Mechanic: This is a great car, it's in great shape. It's only the wheel baring(sp) that's messed up, I'll have it ready today.
Talking to my dad later
Daddy: Now, TM, that's gonna be around 3 or 4 hundred dollars, you got that?
Me: I'm rich bi#$h (ok, I'm lying, I didn't say that, but Dave Chappelle always pops in my head when I'm talking money) mmmhmmm
Later that day
Mechanic: Ok doll baby (he's known me since I was like 5) that's gonna be 222.91.
Me: Dear Jesus, Why you make my daddy so dramatic? He always trying to make my situation worse than it is. I'm so glad I'm your favorite.
Me: Babe, I just emailed you a picture of a watch. It's a $695 Swiss watch, but I can get it for $85. You like it?
TheCount: Well, why don't we go shopping for watches this weekend. Blah, blah, blah
Me: You're an idiot, and this is why God doesn't love  you. Why would we go to the mall and get an $85 watch for $85, when you can get a $695 watch for $85. You were just complaining yesterday about how I always get what I want and get really nice stuff all the time. I told you, it's the blessing of God on my life to find sales, DO YOU WANT THE WATCH OR NOT?
TheCount: Yeah...did you research the company, who is it, how do you know, blah blah blah
Me: You are your own blessing blocker. Get off my phone.
Me: Hey TallWhiteCoworker, do you like this watch? It's a good watch right?
TallWhiteCoworker: Yeah, wow, that's the price?
Me: Yeah, I'm getting it for my husband cuz he loves watches and this is excellent quality.
TallWhiteCoworker: D$$n it, I need a wife. You always find these crazy sales. If you weren't married, I'd marry you right now. Right in this office. You amaze me That's the third time he has told me that, lol. Anybody looking for a tall white skinny man in his early thirties? I can get you the hook up!
Ok, time to get to work :) Had any interesting conversations this week? Y'all know I love dialog, leave it in the comments section.


Product Junkie Diva said...

I was LOL at all of your As for your co worker ...well ok i will reserve my comment about him for future

pserendipity said...

Me: I just really don't get your ex wife. She's trippin.
Tim: She's not trippin. She's just jealous.
Me: Of what?
Tim: Wouldn't you be jealous if you could have ALL.THIS!?!?!
Me: Why are you that way?

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