Friday, January 30, 2009

RanTheCountdom

Get it? The title is TheCount in Random! HAHAHAHA .Well, I thought it was genius when I came up with it at midnight. Last night TheCount provided me with so much blog material that even he knew it and asked if I was going to blog about him. Heck yeah you sorry sucka!
 
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I don't ever have to worry about my hater stats getting low because I will always have one hater in my life...TheCount. Seriously, dude is always trying to throw salt in my game. Last night I was watching the Jazmin Sullivan's new video on my phone and I was singing along. Now everybody knows it's my dream to be a one woman band. I want to sing lead and background and play the intro and outro on my flute. Well I was singing my little heart out last night and I notice TheCount's face is all balled up
TheCount: Can you please stop singing
Me: But I'm the one man band
TheCount: No, you're not. This is the not the calling for your life, God never intended this for you
Me: How do you know?
TheCount: Because I can hear you!
 
Then it was my turn for the balled up face. He's just a hater, he doesn't want me to be successful and leave him, I understand.
 
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Since he wouldn't let me sing along to YouTube anymore, I decided to do the one thing that makes him even madder. Have random food outbursts. As I was sitting on the couch I would just holler out "Yummmyyy brownies and ice cream" or sing out "steak and potatoes." Every time I walked in the kitchen I would sing an ode to the Frosted Flakes box. I even created a waffle house rap dedicated to my favorite meal grilled  cheese, a waffle, and hashbrowns. He kept looking at me, but I just stayed engrossed in what I was doing like I was oblivious the the fact that I was hollering out about foods. I don't know why it makes him so angry, but it makes me laugh so much, lol.
 
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We were supposed to go to the gym last night. When TheCount got in at 7, I was passed out on the couch without a thought about dinner. He finished off what I made yesterday and started to play video games. When I woke up I was trying to cheer him on because he was losing. This bitter dude tells me he doesn't need my cheers. It aint my fault you're losing, don't take it out on me. So I started cheering on his opponent. Y'all TheCount kept losing game after game, we never even made it to the gym. First I felt bad, until TheCount, whose record was 8-9 decided to play somebody whose record was 152-2. Seriously dude? You have lost 5 games in a row and you think you can beat this dude? Once again, I tried to offer wifely support, but he snarled at me he didn't want my cheers and we all know what happened next. He lost.  For 3 hours he played and for 3 hours he lost. Good times man.
 
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I had a nightmare last night. It was really scary. At the end I was trying to scream because a serial killer (it was this girl I went to elementary school with) was trying to cut my face up with a scalpel and TheCount and my Pastor were trying to save me but the couldn't. My hands were cut up and bloodied from protecting my face. Anyway I kept opening my mouth to scream but I couldn't. When I finally did I was screaming in real life and it woke me up. I actually started crying and tried to wake TheCount up because I was scared somebody was in the apartment (there where the dream was taking place and the people who did our quarterly pest spray left our apartment unlocked yesterday). After politely shaking him with no success, I punched him in the back and he got up I told him I was scared and he wrapped his arms around me and I closed my eyes and drifted back off to sleep.

1 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is hysterical...except for ur nightmare...I hate those, particularly because I don't KNOW they're dreams.

 
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