Food Games!

Sometimes I do things that I know will be bad from the start. I press forward, telling myself that it will be ok. Last nights dinner was one of  those instances. Since our freezer looks like a meat locker as a result of me stocking up a few weeks ago, we have started playing Iron Chef Columbia. I take out a meat the night before to defrost in the fridge and in the morning I text TheCount this: Iron Chef Columbia: Tonight's ingredient is Chicken Breasts. You have 3 hours to come up with a meal, or you lose.

 

All he has to do is come up with an idea and I'll research the recipe. Yesterday he decided he wanted peanut chicken. Fundamental problem: I hate peanuts. I'll eat a snickers, and oddly enough a Baby Ruth or a hot PB&J sandwich. But regular peanuts, resee's (Oh my, I can't even spell it that was my 4th and final attempt), or peanut butter flavored things gross me out. Last night, I decided to take one for the team. Last week he asked for vegetable heavy stir fry, which I denied because I don't like it, so  I decided to hook him up last night. I found a recipe for Chicken Stir-Fry with Spicy Peanut sauce. Hmmm combining 2 things I hate, what could go wrong? The food surprised me, it was actually good. I even went and got a second spoonful. An hour later, as we were returning from our walk, I was running for the bathroom. I spent my night curled up on the couch cursing peanuts and Mr. Carver for his wretched discoveries. TheCount came out the room to find me eating waffle cones just to get the taste of dinner out of my burps. Ugggghhhhhhhh. Sweet misery, don't try that one at home!

 

Tonight's ingredient is ground turkey. You guys are welcome to play along, any suggestions?

Get your money right

I took all of zero pictures with the baby this weekend. It was so gloomy and rainy that we didn't really go anywhere. It was cool though, I did watch a marathon of Handy Manny which was quite entertaining.

 

We're having financial workshops at our church right now. They are soooooo good. Last night we learned how to calculate our net worth, more on budgeting, and talked about setting a vision for our family. If things don't line up with the vision, don't do it. How simple is that? Our goals are to pay off our loans and get a house. That is the immediate vision for our family because accomplishing those goals will be the stepping stone to our next set of goals. That means that sacrifices will have to be made. That BEAUTIFUL leather bag that I saw in Macy's on sale for $280 was meant to be mine and I had the money for it, however, it didn't line up with the vision, so I passed on it. That $280 needs to go toward the loan payment. Discipline, it's something I never thought I had, but it turns out I'm doing well. This week my goal is to not spend any money aside from fresh produce, and my meals for when I go out of town this weekend. When my ma was doing my hair this week I was perusing the sales papers and I saw some cosmetics I wanted for buy 1 get 1 free. That's the only time I buy things like that, I was getting all giddy and my mom was like, "you don't need it." I realized she was right and put the paper down. I was never able to do that before, I could not pass up a sale, lol. Don't get me wrong, TheCount and I are still going to enjoy life, but we will think of our goals before we spend. Growing up, my family took a lot of vacations, at least 2 week long trips per year and then many, many small ones. TheCount didn't have that luxury after he turned about 12 because his daddy was sick. Well one of the things I want for our family is vacation memories. The first time TheCount went to New York was with my family, his first trip to the beach was with me (at age 21), his first trip out of the country was with me. I love those memories and I want us to continue to make them. Last year I said I wanted to go on a cruise, he'd never been. Well, this year we're making it happen and every year after we will work hard to make sure we're in a position to go on vacations. What is the point of life if you don't take time to enjoy it?

 

As we work toward our goals and find interesting ways of managing or generating money, I'll share them with you guys (see, I'm not all silliness, lol). I have some websites that she gave us to check out, if they're useful I'll pass them on. Even in this crazy economic time, we don't have to struggle. I get so mad when people talk about they can't afford their rent yet they have fly hair, nails, clothes, and car. You are wearing your rent money! I hope it keeps you warm at night. I know 3 people that have lost, or are losing their houses and they didn't have to be. They didn't fall on hard times, lose their jobs, or all of a sudden face ballooning bills like so many other people that are unfortunately also losing their homes. They made a series of dumb decisions that they should have known not to do, they are all grown with grown children.

 

This one lady even called my mom and was like "pray for me that I get this other house, it's a million dollar home and I can get it for $500,000."

Mom: "Sandy, didn't your other house just go into foreclosure and you're living with your daughter because you didn't have money?"

Sandy: "Yeah, but I know God has this house for me, it's perfect for me"

Mom: "Did God increase your income and give you some financial wisdom? The bank wouldn't give you loan for the last house you tried to buy."

Sandy: "My parents are giving me the money" (she's in her fifties y'all)

Mom: "I'm sorry, I'm not praying for you to get this house you can't afford."

Sandy: "Well I can't just be living anywhere."

Mom: "Well then that will be my prayer, that God will protect you no matter where you live, because it shouldn't be in that house"

 (that sounds kind of mean, but trust me, this was a needed conversation. She's a very special woman. Her husband stashed away money and then ran away to Florida to get away from her. He called her from down there and was like, I'm gone. How cowardly was that? But if he would have said it to her face he probably would be chained up in the basement of her million dollar home.)

 

Everyday this lady calls my mom with stuff like this. Stop spending the money you want to have and spend the money that you do have. Ughhhhhh! If your church or other group is having a financial workshop I encourage you to attend. You don't have to struggle!

And we're off!

The beginning of my weekend is already starting off eventful. Between trying not to pop off on my coworker who keeps wanting me to rearrange my schedule to take him stuff and TheCount and my lunch date, I'm tired already. Since I'm working in Bmore, TheCount came and met me for lunch. We went looking for a place and decided on a pub. We dilly dallied over the menu and finally ordered. As soon as they sat TheCount's soup in front of him, it happened. I saw something out of the corner of my eye. Whenever I see or hear anything unexpected, I always assume it's a mouse and panic. It never is a mouse...except today it was! In the restaurant, while we were about to say grace. It starts running around and then runs to the back. I see somebody walking back there toward where it ran and I think it's a waiter or something trying to do something about it. Nope! The person didn't even see it. I start hyperventilating and repeating, "I'm not ok, I'm not ok" and then I start tearing up. TheCount is looking at me, like what is your issue. I told him about the mouse and was like we have to go NOW! He went to tell the waiter I saw a mouse so he can cancel our order and then we left. I'm so proud of myself, I didn't scream! The last time I saw a mouse I screamed bloody murder, grabbed my keys, and within the next week I moved. That's how I react! If I had been with my best friend, we would have shut that place down. We both just have that nervous energy so if one panics, the other screams and then we feed off each other. Needless to say we won't be going back there, I think I might just avoid that whole block, lol. Now off to find who I can report this to...

In Case You Missed It

Yesterday the fabulous Kelly of "Kellyinaday's Weblog" declared it TM Day. There is no need to hate dear people, I was completely humble and honored during my day yesterday. I called my family and informed them of my prestigious honor and waited while they showered me with praises. Oh, it's great to be me! Hahahahaha, let me stop, but I did wake up singing "Ego" this morning.

 

Hopefully I will have an interesting weekend, because I don't have a thing to talk about. In my morning Bible Study I have been learning about joy. It came right on time because TheCount is getting increasingly upset about his job and really wants another one. Yesterday evening (no, he didn't get me anything for TM day and I let him know that will have to be rectified) he was so down. It didn't help that I got quite cranky yesterday evening because he cut the heat off and we have huge holes in our ceiling from the construction so it was even more cold. After he volunteered to watch my ti-voed episode of Top Model with me, I realized he really needed cheering up! I sacrificed my dignity and self esteem for his sake, and tried new exercises. That may not seem funny to you, but you've never seen me work out. I did my normal lunges and calf raises. Then I attempted push ups since Nerd Girl has everybody doing the 100 push up challenge. It didn't go well, so I looked up wall push ups. Now that's something I can do! I did a few of those while TheCount mocked me in the background. I did my crunches and some other leg thingy on my exercise ball and decided to close it off with some jumping jacks. Yeahhhhhhh, I shouldn't have done that! My left arm went up and I fell over in pain. I couldn't raise it. Convinced it was broken I started moaning and groaning and TheCount came over to help me. I got up to try again and then just decided to do one-armed jumping jacks which kind of messed up my balance. I was flailing around everywhere and TheCount looked mortified, "Baby, can you control your body, why are you always falling on the floor?"  And then he started reminiscing the day he tried to teach me cartwheels. He laughed at me for like 5 minutes last night as he imitated me throwing myself on the floor in an attempt to cartwheel. I probably should have been embarrassed because he was definitely laughing AT me and not with me, but I was just happy to see him smile. [This event will go in my folder because it is earning me points toward my Appreciate TM week]

 

Back to something that matters, what are some of your favorite exercises?

 

{Right now I'm listening to a conversation, one lady keeps telling the other, hold on for a moment, let me finish this. Every 5 seconds the lady starts her story again. The lady keeps on saying wait a moment please, and then the other lady starts with another question. It's so rude. She also keeps talking over the lady when she finally tries to answer her questions! She comes in here like 6 times a day and this same thing happens. Maybe if you would wait and be quiet when she talks you won't have to keep on asking her questions! The question she is asking now I specifically remember her asking on Tuesday. I'm going to need her to retire if she can't remember the basics}

A whole bunch of stuff

Last night we were to exhausted to go to Bible study, I really wish it didn't take at least an hour to get there on Wednesdays, but I really haven't been able to find a place to live closer to our church/family that I like. Since we didn't go, we watched it live on the internet. I decided to put a conditioning treatment on my hair while we watched service. At some point we both fell asleep because next thing I know it was 2:30 am and I still had to wash and roll my hair! They're also redoing our plumbing this week at our apartment complex so we had to move furniture and art to make it easier. When TheCount got up at 3am, he couldn't get back to sleep so he cleaned the apartment ( I told you, when people come, nothing is out of place) while I baked under the dryer. We didn't get back into bed until 5:30, with our alarms set for 7. Y'all know it was a fight to get out of bed! I was all the way under the cover basking in the heat of my heated mattress pad and it was soooo cold in the apartment. Surprisingly, TheCount came over and was waking me up using gentle soothing tones instead of ripping the covers off me and hollering "get up lazy bones." I think he finally realized that when hollers in the morning all I do is get right back in the bed and sleep until 9 or 10 making me 3 hours late for work. Needless to say, we are some sleepy folks.

*****************

 

My sister just called me to say that if I have some babies she will move back home. She better not play with me! If she comes back home I will have all the babies she wants, I am not kidding, that's how much I miss her. She's in school in Florida and has a boyfriend down there (who's from there) and he said he would be willing to live up here. The day my sister moves back for good will be the happiest day in TheCount's and my life. He always says he wishes my sister would finish with school and come back so I can have my sidekick back.

******************

 

I can not wait to babysit tomorrow! I wonder if they'll let me keep her until Sunday? I'm telling y'all this is the happiest baby in the world! I'm definitely gonna try and take some pictures and maybe a video because she has that happy baby voice, lol. I guess 3 year olds aren't really babies, but to me you're a baby until you start school. Even TheCount is in awe of her and it takes a lot to impress him!

*******************

 

My Bible study this morning was really good! I mean sooooo good. If you're having a rough day, email me, I'll forward it to you it was that powerful. I was smiling the whole time I read it, I'm going to print it out and put in the bathroom so we can be reminded: We are not called to merely survive, we are called to thrive! That one is going on my quote posterboard too!

********************

 

I'm having a hair dilemma again. It's relaxer time and I don't know who to go to. I don't want to go to the people I went to last time because she would not rinse it out even though I said I wasn't ok. I asked my mom to do it and she refused, she offered to go with me to her hair salon, but I cannot stand that lady. The last time I went there she made me so mad I was crying. She spent the entire time telling me I was too young to get married (ummm I have a mom and a dad, and he has parent's, and we have pastors so  thanks but no thanks don't need your .02). When I left there I was texting my best friend and my sister about our conversation and this is what they said:

BestFriend: Ok, where are you now, let's meet up and go burn her shop down

Sister: Ok, when I get home tomorrow we will go find her and burn her shop down

 

That's why I love those chicks! Of course my mom took my phone from me and told both of them they better stop, but ever since then I won't go near that lady. She's toxic. Don't base other peoples lives off of your failures, especially strangers! Perhaps if she had given me 3 hours of how to build a successful marriage and what NOT to do then I wouldn't want to kick her in the shin every time my mom says her name. Back to the point, I need my hair done but don't have a person. If I buy the relaxer, base my scalp. and then sit in front of my mom and hand her the relaxer do you think she'll still tell me no?

YOU post

It's a crazy day for me here at work. I guess I can't complain, these days are few and far between. I did have to miss my workout so I may go for a walk as soon as I get a second to catch my breath. Anybody have some funny stories to share?

It backfired, emphasis on fire!

I've been on a quest to end my prudeness. I mean, I'm not going to walk around talking about doing the grown up or anything because I can't loosen up that much, but TheCount's nickname for me should not be grandma (the granny nickname came from TheCount walking in on me reading the tv guide while watching murder she wrote followed with the golden girls). I cover my eyes during sects scenes in movies and I look away when people kiss, because I feel those are private moments. I found 2 things that I would be willing to do. The fist was change my lounge clothes from those one piece pink pajamas to at least some nice silk chemises. I got a lot of nice ones at my bridal shower. I had one on yesterday and TheCount was like, uhhh granny who gave you that brown flowered thing? I started cracking up and told him it was my attempt to be sectsy! Then I offered to put my pink one piece jammies on, which he declined. I suggest you take what you can get buddy!

 

The second thing I attempted will serve as my good deed for you for the year! I was in the store with my mom and we saw the "k/y yo/urs and mi/ne" stuff. I told her how fun it looked in the commercial and that I had a coupon for it. She is all for me trying to be exciting so she made me get it. So I showed TheCount and was like didn't the commercial make this seem like magic juice, lol? We agreed to try it. Ummmmm, y'all know I'm not going to go into details, but look at the title of this post and draw your own conclusions. I really want to know if they tested this product on prostitutes that were used to STD pain. Let this be a word of advice don't buy that! Y'all know how cheap TheCount is right? Why did he say we should find somebody to give it to since we only used it once! If you have anybody that you're trying to keep from having sects, I have a good product for you, lol. It'll deter her for a lonnnngggg time!

 

Tomorrow, we will be back to our regularly scheduled Grandma Prudence talk.

For better or for worse

First off, my mom invited us over for dinner on Friday. Why did this woman make gravy covered porkchops wrapped in tortillas? She was on the phone talking about how good they were. Ummm momma, when did you start smoking weed?

****************************

I love being married, so when people ask me about it I always respond positively. We have 2 sets of friends that about to take the plunge. While talking to TheCount's cousin last week, he was like "I bet y'all have tons of fun huh?" I was like, "yeah man! There is always laughter here" :) And he was like, "see that's what I'm looking forward to." Well I hope you also expect the bad days. Days like Saturday, lol. My goodness, if I could have figured out a way to be TheCount within an inch of his life without killing him or doing permanent damage, I would have.

 

Let's start this by saying Saturday is my day of rest. Our Sunday's are normally just as full as Monday-Friday which means I need a day to recover. Errands and such are for lunch breaks and Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday evenings, NOT Saturday. If cleaning is to be done (I prefer cleaning on Fridays) then it is done at a slow and relaxed pace on commercial breaks. Also, since I didn't have a sit under hair dryer I tend to do my hair on Saturday so I can leave the rollers in for an extended period of time. I'm not opposed to doing things on the weekend,  but I like to have them scheduled so I can know what to expect. Saturdays are also for sleeping in. The only thing that will get me up before noon is a matinee and breakfast. My dear sweet husband knows all of those things about me. I haven't changed in almost 6 years we have been together. On Saturday he had to go to the DMV, emissions, to get an oil change, the barber shop, and to play basketball that evening. Cool, that meant I'd have the house to myself all day and planned my day accordingly. I woke up at 1pm and found him sitting on the couch playing video games. He was waiting to go to the barbershop since his morning errands didn't take long. Alright, I sat next to him on the couch and dozed in and out. I woke up at around 2, his hair appointment was at 2:30. The barbershop is 45 minutes away. Hmmmm, somebody is exercising poor judgement. He then gets up to take a shower and is rushing all over the place. Before he left, my momma called me and asked me to come down there (my parents live on the way to his barbershop) I asked him if he could drop me off, he said he didn't have time since it was now 2:30. Well, you're already gonna be late, what difference is 5 more minutes gonna make? I was like whatever, go away, let me enjoy my me time. I get ready to go wash my hair and I see blood EVERYWHERE in the bathroom. TheCount gets nosebleeds every time he takes a shower but come on now dude. On the sink, cabinets, rugs, and in the shower? Then I realized the rug was flipped over. Why? Because last week he spilled toothpaste on it and instead of cleaning it like I asked, he flipped it over! I was like, oh he has to clean this mess up when he gets home. I go on about my business and as soon as I finish rolling my hair I get a phone call:

 

TheCount: "babe, can you straighten up? Friend A, B, and B's girlfriend are coming over tonight"

 

Is this dude for real? I was soooooooo mad. My momma called me a little while after that and I was flipping out and she was cracking up. "I can't leave the house, my hair isn't done. We have one tv, the 5 of us will never agree on something to watch, and I don't wanna clean this messy bathroom. I'm not the idiot that takes stupidly hot showers. No he don't need to go to the doctor, he needs to stop being an idiot and take cooler showers. Trifling negro. This girl is going to come to my house and look at me like I'm the dirtiest, laziest chick ever" Y'all my momma was dying laughing which only made me more mad. She was like, nobody is gonna want to get married because you're mean all the time. Why did she fuel my fire? I was like "obviously not mean enough cuz they won't stop coming to my darn house. I'm always looking busted up cuz my husband is rude, oh well, and they aren't watching basketball either. I'm going to find the girliest show on tv and make them watch it." I got off the phone to start cleaning. Then I bumped the trash can and realized how heavy it still was. I was cleaning it out last night because the bag leaked (why? Because the trash taker-outer didn't take it out after putting packs and packs of bloody meat trays in it). I had water and bleach in it. How did this fool not see that when he put the bag in? Did he really not look? Did he really not hear a splash when he put trash in bag in the can that was filled HALFWAY with water? I didn't want to walk outside and dump it and be the hood chick with the big red rollers and I for sure wasn't dumping it in my tub/sink/toilet, so I left it. So I'm walking around the house cleaning up and cussing him out in my head. Then I remembered "God knows my thoughts" and started to give myself an attitude adjustment. Then my vacuum broke, I started spazzing. Then something told me to call TheCount and ask what time they were coming. Since it was about 4pm, I assumed like 7/8 pm like usual. This fool tells me that FriendA will be there in about 15 minutes, but that he was just leaving his momma's house 45 minutes away. I swear in all my dramatics I cried out "God, why hast thou forsaken me?" Y'all my house is spotless when maintenance has to come in, I scrub before the pest people come spray, I do not let people see my house not 100%. My mom called me back to check on me (she knew I was still in there acting a fool, lol) and told me to call TheCount and tell him they can all go to her house and my dad would cook them dinner and they could watch the game there. I was like they can't cuz Friend A is about to knock on the dang door. Somehow, she found this funny too. When friend A saw me at the door with my head full of rollers he was like "TheCount told you I was coming right?" Ohhhh, I got so mad and embarrassed.  Friend B never even showed up and Friend A only stayed for like an hour which instead of making me relieved, made me more mad, lol. I'm mad at him for being inconsiderate, he's mad at me for being a stick in the mud. It was a trying day for everybody involved! **Something else happened but it will have to go in another post this week**

 

God clearly saw my despair and answered a prayer from couple of weeks ago, he's sending me a baby (ummm, not to keep). This weekend my favorite baby in the world is coming up to stay with us whooohoooo. I also worked in the nursery at church yesterday. I had all the babies I could want! After church yesterday TheCount and I went straight to the beauty supply store and bought a sit under hair dryer so we don't have to deal with this hair drama anymore (of course not before he played El Cheapo asking why I needed an $80 dryer.  I told him that since he tortured me the day before it was the LEAST he could do. TheCount and I are cool now, and had a great day yesterday but seriously being married is not all sunshine, rainbows, and doing "it". There are days when attempted murder seems like a great idea.

 

 

Jesus Loves Me

Pink scoffed at the idea of Appreciate TM Week, but I'm convinced yesterday was appreciate TM day! I was feeling good at the end of the day.

 

While at work I was walking through the office. Most of the time when people in this office see me, I'm behind a desk. I walked through and this lady was like "Oh my, isn't she so cute? I had no idea she was so tall and thin." Y'all she made my day, no, I think she made my month.

 

Last night TheCount's cousin came up so that we could help him pick out an engagement ring. Since he was coming up right after work we told him he could have dinner with us. I made Darius' Sesame Chicken (if you haven't noticed yet, I'm quite obsessed with him, lol). The whole time I was in the kitchen cooking TheCount was in there putting away the groceries I bought. It was meat day, lol. I had ground turkey, porkchops, chicken breast, drumsticks. flank steak, and beef for stewing. He had the task of breaking them all down and labeling the bags while I cooked our freezer is packed now. Anyway, I'm always nervous when I have to cook for people because my feelings would be hurt if they hated it. As soon as his cousin pulled up, I was fluffing the rice and sprinkling my sesame seeds. He came in and was like, wow, what's this? TM, you made this? We all sat down to eat and after his first bite he was like "oh wow, this is really good." Y'all already know I was cheesing. The whole time he was eating he was like "oh my goodness, you made this from scratch? This is so good." Being the greedy-10-minute-dinner-eating-cows that we are, we were finished way before him, TheCount was like, don't rush man, we'll wait for you. He was like "oh, I'm not. I'm savoring every bite of this." When we got back from the mall later he went right back into the kitchen and I see him and TheCount standing over the sink eating up the rest of the chicken, lol. Needless to say, he is welcome to come over for dinner anytime!

 

TheCount has been extra appreciative of my looks lately. I don't know if he's been reading the blog and noticed that I needed some reaffirmation, or if he is genuinely found a great new love for my body, lol. He was dishing out the compliments yesterday. Even this morning as he walked past me he doubled back to tell me how good my butt looked in my pants. Oh how I love this dude!

*******

We both fell asleep on the couch last night, I got up and got in the bed and drifted back off to sleep. All of a sudden I popped up and started praying. It was kind of scary, cuz normally I'm very basic with prayer. I say what I have to say and then close it with amen. I don't normally get hype or anything. All of a sudden I find myself sitting straight up sounding like my pastor, lol. Then something told me to get up and go to the front door because we weren't safe. I did find our front door completely unlocked at 3am, which kind of shook me. I went and tapped TheCount and asked him to come get in the bed because I was a little scared. I followed him around the house while he got water, went to the bathroom, brushed his teeth, everything. I couldn't be more than 2 feet from him. He could sense something was wrong so when we got in bed he held me close and prayed over us. I don't know if something was supposed to happen last night or not, but I felt comforted as I drifted back off to sleep.

I'm is not dum

I hate being treated like an idiot. Long winded explanations long after I have said "alright" give me an eye twitch like you wouldn't believe. I don't know if the person actually thinks I'm dumb or if they are just trying to help. Trust me, when I need help I am not afraid to ask for it! I will ask a question about any and everything, so when I say I understand, trust me, I understand. Yesterday I had to go meet my coworker to give him the presentations I made for him (if you remember the copy/paste dude, this is him). He lives a few streets over from me so we just arrange a meeting place around either of our evening errands. Yesterday we had this conversation:

 

Z: "TM, have you left work yet?"

Me: "Yes, I left, but I probably won't be down there until about 6."

Z: "Alright, do you know where Centennial park is?"

Me: "Yes"

Z: "Ok, let's meet there. Do you know how to get there?"

Me: "Yes"

Z: "Have you been there before?"

Me: "No, but I drive past it every day."

Z: :"Ok, well you don't want to drive past it, you want to get in your left lane."

Me: "Yeah, I know, ok"

Z: "Do you know how to get into the park?"

Me: you are not in my fave 5, get off my phone "yes"

Z: "Ok, you want to turn into the park. The park has a huge man made lake, it's like 2 miles to go around it. But I won't be there, I'll be at the playground with my kids"

Me: "OK"

Z: "Call me when you get close, and I'll tell you how to get here."

Me: "Yeah ok"

 

When I got to the park:

Z: "TM! Thanks for bringing me this stuff, I really appreciate it"

Me: "No problem"

Z: "See right there," pointing to a huge body of water, "that right there is a man made lake. It's about 2 miles around.

Me: hmmmm, where have I heard this before? "I see"

Z: "Yeah, it's a really nice park. You and your husband can come back and walk the lake over there.

Me: really, I can come to the public park 5 minutes from my house? You mean it? You think we can handle a task like walking around a lake? "Yeah, we will, ok, bye"

Z: "You know how to get out?"

Me: I'm guessing the same way I got in, since the park only has one entrance and all "Yep"

 

Maybe I'm being too sensitive, but my word, I get it already! I'm is not dum.

 

 

Banned from Don Pablos

Nah, just kidding, I did not get banned from the restaurant last night, but I don't think I'll be going back anytime soon. I waited all day for all you can eat taco night. I was dizzy and starving, I had made it through the day on 200 calories, just so I could go wild that night. Let's all guess how many tacos I ate..........one. It was so funny. We got an appetizer that was really good so I was eating on that. Our waiter was excellent, we had some of the best customer service in a long time last night. It took a while for them to bring out our food, a long while. I had one beef taco and two chicken. Let's just say, I could have gone to Taco Bell, because that's exactly what it tasted like. I couldn't even find the chicken in the other tacos, all I saw was onions and sauce. I even said to TheCount, ummm I think they forgot the meat in this one. So I dismantled the tacos and then just got disgusted and let them sit there. The waiter kept coming back to check on us and eventually he just asked if I was done since my  plate was still full. I told him yes. He asked did I want some more, I replied no. Then he asked was it good. I was like "ummmm, not at all." He felt bad and offered to bring me something else which I politely declined. A little while later the manager came by and was like, you didn't like your tacos ma'am? Well then I'll take them off your bill, there is no reason you should pay for something you didn't enjoy. Then he asked me to come back and try them again since they have many tasty things on the menu that I should enjoy. I told him I would and thanked him.

 

 Then TheCount and I were at the table joking around and he said something smart. So I picked up my knife and threatened to stab him in the eye. As I was gripping the knife and asking what he would do I cut his eye out, he starts laughing hysterically. I look up and see our waiter standing there looking at me like I was crazy. I was so embarrassed! The waiter dropped our bill and ran, lol. TheCount was like "hahahaha, he's gonna go to the kitchen and tell everybody you're crazy and then they are all gonna stare and laugh. You've been exposed, the world has seen your evilness." All I could do was laugh because I brought it on myself. Needless to say, I will be searching for another favorite Mexican restaurant because I love me some taco's, but not those. Any suggestions?

 

I didn't get to work today until 11am because I hurt my shoulder doing jumping jacks last night and my eyes are swollen like you wouldn't believe. I want to hide under a rock. Perhaps I will be attending Bible study from my couch tonight.

These are my confessions...

I'm not eating very much during the day today because we're going to Don Pablos for all you can eat Taco night. WootWoot! I'll try not to act a fool, I'll calculate my calories beforehand so I can no exactly how much I can eat :)

 

I sing an entire CD every night in bed. We cut on the ipod for bedtime so that we won't stay out in the living room watching tv all night and sleeping on the couch. It's worked wonders except for the fact that if I hear music I will sing it. It's a fact of life, lol. Last night it was Chrisette Michelle, Sunday was John Legend, Saturday was Beyonce and Friday was Joss Stone. Once the CD is over I close my eyes and go to bed.

 

I don't know why people think it's funny when I say I had a run in with some bad birth control. That crap wrecked havoc on my body! We had a long conversation about it at the gym yesterday and a whole lot of people have had issues with the pill. I want to just not take them, but then y'all will be reading about TM and her 22 kids cuz I know TheCount and I would be very reckless.

 

Last week I looked in the mirror and said aloud to myself, "How is it possible that I can be this pretty?" And then I cracked up at the sheer arrogance of it all, but I still think it's true. TheCount thinks it's because I've watched so much My Wife and Kids lately.

 

This month for my gas reimbursement I'm getting a couple hundred dollars since I've had to go to Baltimore to work most days. It makes me smile! It's only 20 miles from my house, I can come and go as I please, I get to meet up with TheCount for lunch and they pay me extra! Ahhhh life is good! All of our savings account is "extra" money, whenever we get unexpected income we deposit it right into savings. It keeps us from going on dumb shopping sprees and then complaining about a lack of money.

 

TheCount and I were discussing the cruise my family is taking in August. He has been hesitant to say we can go (although I am getting on that boat even if I have to drug him and drag him) so he has been looking for any reason to say no. Yesterday I gave him the formal presentation with pictures, itinerary, and pricing. I told him it was $388 per person. Do you know this fool asked me if that was per day? I was so mad that he thought I would be asking to go on a trip that would cost over $4000 that I kicked him in his side. What kind of fool does he take me for? We are not balling like that yet so why does he think I would make that kind of request, especially for a cruise just celebrating my sisters 21st BDay, it's not like it's a something worthwhile like "Let's appreciate TM week".

 

I don't like when people constantly talk about what they are going to do instead of just doing it. Yesterday my coworker kept talking about how she wanted to lose weight. Well then be about it! I go down to the gym every day, talk to me while we are on the treadmill  DOING something about it.TheCount was whining about his phone still being cracked yesterday and I snapped, "Don't say another stupid word about that phone. Go get it fixed or shut up." He looked at me and was like, "dag babe, that was a little harsh, lol." Now I have a new mantra to add to my increasing list of life motto's, "Don't talk about it, be about it." Maybe I'll create a poster board of all my favorite quotes since the list is getting so long.

 

My sister is trying to pledge. I'm so excited for her, she went to the meeting to turn in her information last night. Let's all join hands and say a prayer for SisterTM!

Eviiillllll

We  went to see Watchmen over the  weekend. I'll just say that I spent  a lot of time with my eyes closed or making a "ewwwwwwww" face and staring up at the ceiling. TheCount and I also went shopping. I don't know why but I can't seem to convince him to let me buy a $300 purse, lol. Even standing there stroking the bag and purring "isn't she lovely? Just feel it, it's like butter," didn't work. I'm going to have to work on my skills. I like when we shop together better than when shopping with friends because neither of us have a problem being honest about stuff.

 

In Eddie Bauer:

Me: "Do you think this is ugly?"

TheCount: "Yeah! Hahahaha"

Me: looking sad "Oh"

TheCount: "You liked it?"

Me: "Yes"

TheCount: "Hahahahaha, do you babe"

 

In JCPenny:

TheCount: "Man, they don't have these pants in my size"

Me: "Good thing, cuz they are ugly!"

TheCount: "What? Man, I could rock these. You being a hater. Fly as I am? Man with the right shoes and blahblahblah"

Me: "Ummm, somebody is feeling himself a bit too much"

 

In Macy's:

Stranger: "Is this shirt too small?"

TheCount: Looking him over "Well, I mean, you can pair it with..."

Me: this shirt makes him look like he has boobies "You need a bigger size"

Stranger: "This is the biggest one, it was on the clearance rack"

Me: "Then that's where it needs to stay. Before you even said anything I wondered to myself 'why is dudes shirt so small."

Stranger: "Well thanks for being honest!"

Me: "No problem, I don't want you to get laughed out the club, because no girl will be checking for you in that shirt"

 

In some shoe store:

Me: reaching out to touch some shoes

TheCount: "mmmm, don't think you want to do that"

Me: "They're ugly?"

TheCount: "Beyond ugly"

 

 

This is what friends need to do for each other. It would cut down on a lot of tragedies that we see. Ill-fitting clothes and horrible patterns would be a thing of the past if people were just a bit more honest during the shopping process!

 

A little more honesty from the weekend:

 

Our pastor spoke at a church in DC yesterday evening so we went to go hear him. When we got on our row this lady's baby reached out for me, so I reached out and took her (yeahhh, probably should have asked, lol). I was sitting there playing with her:

Me: "Honey, can I have one of these (pointing at the baby)?"

TheCount" You have one right now, enjoy her, then give her back to her momma"

Me: "Can I have one of my own?"

TheCount: "Ask me later...like 3 years from now"

 

One More:

Me: dancing and singing in the kitchen "I don't need no beat I just sing it to piano ohhhohhhhooohhhhh" Looking up and realizing TheCount is watching me and making a face, "Hmmm, you think I need a piano?"

TheCount: "Baby, you need autotune!"

 

This dude is pure evil! LOL

 

 

Just let your mind wander

I left my cell phone at home today. I left half of my lunch at home today. It was the half I need to eat the part I brought. I guess  I'll have oatmeal for lunch. I was an hour late to work today. People are still sending me faxes for something that had a deadline of last Monday. All of my hair wasn't dry when I took my rollers out this morning. I put a few pecans in my oatmeal this morning, now I have gas. Red polish on my fingers is not a good look. My sister told me this for years, I now see what she's talking about. It gives me grandma hands.

 

Coconut oil and Coconut milk on my hair for a few hours before I wash it is THA TRUTH! My hair is super silky even if some of my curls are a little droopy all this and I'm 8 weeks post relaxer. I could actually go natural if this coconut treatment keeps my hair this soft and manageable. I did another 100 lunges yesterday (did 200 on Wednesday). My legs and butt are screaming, but it hurts so good! My pants today aren't cutting into my waist. They were the last time I wore them. My boss is working from home today! I have great plans for my lunch hour (or 2) in The Container Store. I just scheduled my workout time for the day in the gym. Go Hard or Go Home and Must Have Beyonce Legs are our motto's. We are a dangerous duo! My workout buddy dyed her hair a purplish color. I soooo love it! I soooo wanna bite her style and do it too! I'll be glad when my hair color finishes growing out. These light ends just make my hair look damaged, lol. Maintenance broke a bowl and a mug in our apartment the other day. The community manager called me at work apologizing and offering to pay. I kept laughing in her ear. Dude, things break, it happens. Our table only seats 4 people, we didn't really need that 8th bowl and mug. When I got home maintenance was still there apologizing to me, I laughed at them too. It's OK!!! We are not that uppity, it came from Target. They took out the trash for me and everything, asked if I needed them to do anything else while they were there. Nope, just some advice: when checking for which shelf is broken, look for the shelf with nothing on it! Do you really think we would stack glass dishes on a broken shelf?

 

I don't like mean people. I don't allow them in my life, they don't exist in my world. I'm always shocked when I come across one. I call my mommy, tell her what's going on and then declare, "but that's just not nice! This is not acceptable in TM land!" It baffles me really that somebody would intentionally hurt someones feelings. If I ever hurt your feelings, please let me know, it WILL NOT happen again. I'm a very sensitive person, it hurts me to see others hurting. Mean people are really just hurting on the inside.

 

I no longer walk when I'm in our house. I do lunges everywhere. This makes TheCount laugh. I make very ugly faces when I do them because I'm not that coordinated. I just had an office lesson on lunges with my Pepsidrankin' officemate. I will not let her fall to the wayside! We are getting this weight off everybody in here. Maybe I should declare one day next week lunge day and ban walking. Hmmm, I don't think I have that much power.

Playing Catch Up

Mon, Tues, and Wed posts were all scheduled last week because I have been so busy. I tell ya, you have not because you ask not. Remember a couple of weeks ago when I was crying and whining about not getting any work. Well, now I'm heading 2 projects. I've barely had time to read/comment on my other 2 million blogs. I think the bulk of the rush is over and I have an impressive spreadsheet to show for it!

 

***************

 

Now it's time to get caught up in what has been going on in the world of TM. Over the weekend I decided that the world didn't deserve the joy and light that is my shining personality, so I mellowed out. TheCount doesn't know what to do when I'm calm, he was convinced I was mad at him and plotting his death. Friday, Saturday , and Sunday he kept on asking what was wrong. Dude! Nothing is wrong, I'm just chilling. It was funny, I forgot how deep my voice actually is when I'm not all hyped up.

 

****************

Sunday we went hiking with my parents. I really kicked my workouts up this week and I haven't had an appetite really. I've been tracking my calories and some days I'm not even hitting 1,000. Don't worry, I'm not starving myself, but I've been so busy I normally have my oatmeal breakfast, snacks, then dinner. Today is No Meat day. Grapes for breakfast, carrots for lunch, and black bean soup with Darius' corn muffins for dinner. I wanted to eat a little more, but I'm working in downtown Baltimore this week and I don't use the facilities in this building. NO bathroom, microwave, or lunchroom for TM. Especially since they have signs all around about this asbestos project going on. I'm staying right in my already renovated office and then rolling out.

 

***************

 

I almost died at the gym with my workout buddy on Tuesday. I got a little power happy on the treadmill and selected level 17 out of 20. My workout buddy looked over at me and was like "geez, next to you I feel like I'm not doing anything." As sweat dripped off my nose I let out my war cry of "must have Beyonce legs by summertime!" After the workout I felt so good though, I can't wait until I'm back in the office tomorrow so we can do that again.

 

****************

Why do the people's try me all the time? I went to TJ Maxx as I do 2-3 times a week to stalk the shoe section. I struck gold and found a pair of brown wedge heels for $2.00. I was flipping out. I took them up to the register and once again had some drama. 

 

Cashier: "Is this the right price?"

HeadChickInCharge: "Can't be" she turned around and marked the shoes up to $15.00. Still not a lot, but how is she gonna play me like that?

Me: oohhhhhhh no, it aint about to go down like that! Mumbling, "well I don't want them then, that aint fair, I want the price I saw on the shoe. There are tons of marked down shoes back there, go mess with those."

HCIC: "well this isn't the right price," as she tries to pull off the sticker to see if I put it on there. By now another cashier sees what is going on and looked at my face.

OtherCashier: "$2.00 is the right price, the employee just used the wrong color sticker"

HCIC: "But these were on the new shipment, they shouldn't be $2."

OC: "Ring up the shoes!"

HCIC: "well, you got a good deal"

 

 Do not stand in the way of TM and a sale! I was going to fight her to the death for those shoes. I'll be going back tomorrow, they were moving out stuff to bring in some new things I think because the size 9 section was quite sparse.

 

******************

 

I think the people at my church read this blog. There were so many catch phrases being thrown out last night I didn't even want to use mine. That and the fact that I was distracted by the worst weave I had ever seen. It was horrible! Oh, and I was determined to wear the jeans I wanted even though they don't reflect my current size. My thighs were trying to escape all night, lol.

 

*****************

I went to lunch with TheCount yesterday since we were both working in Bmore. He was so excited to take me to this place, I didn't have the heart to tell him the food was horrible. It was so bland. The potatoes were dry, the corn tasted old, and the chicken was boring. I was looking around like what the heezy hay is this? Are you hiring a chef? Hire me! I know it's a recession, but I'm going to need you to throw the food away at the end of the week, not use it again until it runs out.

 

**************

I've been having very, very strange dreams lately. They make me kind of uncomfortable. Sometimes they are scary, but other times they are great, like the one about Darius getting his own food network show! It seems as though this week all of the dreams had to do with scandals and corruption though. Lord, if you're trying to tell me something, can you send it in an email? Thanks!

Med School Exams

We were watching "10 Years Younger" while working out at the gym last week, and they gave the lady lasik surgery. I remarked how bad I wanted to get that done to which my workout partner told me, "Oh you should totally do it! It was awesome." I looked over at her and shot jealous rays at her. She asked me if I had been saving up for it, and I told her no, because we have more important things to pay for. She asked why I didn't I just use the payment plan.

TM does not do payment plans. I HATE owing money. If I can't buy it outright then I don't need it. The only things I need in life are food, shelter, one outfit, and for where I live and work, a vehicle. So unless it has to do with those things, I don't NEED it. I have a credit card, and I only use it for online purchases so my bank account info isn't at risk. I pay it off every single month as I do with my Macy's card. Another reason why I haven't gotten the surgery yet is because we have student loan debt. How am I gonna spend $4000 on some eye surgery when that money could eliminate so much debt?

I've come up with a simple solution on how I can get the surgery and not spend all that money, be a guinea pig. I figure before they graduate from eye surgery school they have to practice right? I could be their final exam! I shared this with my workout buddy and she forbade me from volunteering my eyes. Once they make it to their final they should be pretty good right? I mean, what's the worst that could happen? I'd be blinded for life? Hmmm, that could pose a problem since I stare at a computer, cell phone, or television all day every day.

I still don't think it's that bad of an idea, but I'm open for suggestions. How can I get somebody to give me Lasik surgery?

Sleeping Beauty

Let me tell y'all a little secret about TheCount. He is the world's hardest sleeper. It makes no kind of sense. A lot of times I get so mad because I'm trying to get him off the couch and into the bed, but he won't budge. So what do I do? Take cell phone pics of him so I can laugh it up. Since he is currently passed out in his man chair and won't get up, I've decided to do a post dedicated to the sleeping Count!



The little blank spot on the couch is where I sit since my broken computer has to be braced against the side of the couch. Notice my nail supplies and my glass of water(PJD).

I hate this darn Redskins blanket! LOL


This is on our old couch, it's much smaller than the one we have now as you can see. The pink comforter he has is my special blanket (he complains about it a lot, but he also steals it a lot).


If he ever comes to my blog and reads this he is gonna be so mad, lol.


Since I can't just put my baby on blast without blasting myself, here is one he took of me while I was watching t.v.

Live Your Life

We have this hanging in our bathroom, it's my motto. I know sometimes y'all read what I write on here and think, this chick is stupid/crazy/very silly. It's funny, because I am much more silly when I am by myself than when I'm around other people, even TheCount. When I'm home alone I walk around shrieking and screaming, dancing in the kitchen, and laughing as loud as I possibly can. Why? Because it makes me happy!

Dance as though no one is watching you

In the car on my way from work I blast the radio and act out music videos. I've seen other drivers glance over at me while I bounce around in my seat and I just keep on dancing. I'm not as bold to actually dance when people are watching, but I'm working on it!

Love as though you've never been hurt

I've been hurt in life. I was molested, I was raped. It was by people I knew, people I loved and it hurt. Those are the only 2 events in my life that I will lie to people about. My mom has asked before if anything ever happened to me, why I changed from being so outgoing and happy to a reclusive crybaby. I told her that nothing ever happened. It used to really eat me up inside because I blamed myself. One day, I decided to not let those events define me. I had many more happy days than those few days of torture. It helped me to begin letting people back into my life, to make friends again. It feels good to say I have a friend I can call if I need something.

Sing as though no one can hear you

This one, I've mastered! TheCount can verify, I will sing whenever, wherever much to the dismay of everybody that can hear me. I challenge you to try it. It is extremely liberating to belt out your favorite song and not care if your voice cracks or if you forget the words, do it, I dare you!

Live as though heaven is on earth

TheCount actually participates on this one. It is not a game folks, if you aren't enjoying life, why the heck are you alive? Find the things that make you happy and do them (even if it means yelling whoodie whooo in church sometimes)! God does not want to look down and see all his children defeated and miserable. I'm not saying that hard times don't come, but you have to remember that in the end you will have the victory so just keep on pushin'! If it's happening to me, then I can handle it. Didn't God say he wouldn't put more on us than we can bare? When I'm on here acting out, or being out of line it's just me being me. Enjoying life.

There is an old gospel song that I like to sing:

I've had some good days, I've had some hills to climb. But when I look back, and think things over. All of my good days, outweigh my bad days, and I can't complain.

I've left out a few lines, but that's how I sing it, lol. I don't mind posting about my bad days, days when I feel ugly, fat, or just plain funky but I always make sure that I spend more time laughing and enjoying life than I do crying about it.

**this post brought to you by a very, very funky day and scheduling posts at 2a.m. and talking to some people that never have anything positive to say**

Food and Fitness

A lot of people at work are on a weight loss kick. One lady is trying to eat healthy because she is pregnant and doesn't want to balloon (she is petite and her clothes are so stylish, if she can't fit them anymore I'm sure people would gladly take them from her). My officemate is trying to lose weight because she wants to have another baby (and she's very heavy). My new work out partner is trying to lose weight because she doesn't want to  be fat for her birthday (her words, not mine). I want to lose weight because my clothes don't fit and I have a cruise to go on in August.

 

 Ok, I'm about to be real with y'all, please don't hurt my feelings. In the past 6 months I went from 135 pounds to 150. This means that I can no longer even pull my size 4's up over my hips, they stop firmly below the butt in protest. My size 6's can barely be buttoned, and now my size 8's are tight. I'm not buying a bigger size. I will be on here telling y'all about how I got fired for coming to work in my underwear and a camisole before I buy a bigger size. I could see if there was a good reason for my weight gain, a baby to show for it, a bout with depression to blame it on, extreme eating where I enjoyed pizza and fries every day, but I don't even have a good story, so it must go!

 

I have a picture somewhere of me in the water the last time I went on a cruise. I was 18 and 125pounds. I was so confident in running around the beach and being photographed. Now, whenever I see my dad with the camera, I run the other way! I'm going to print it out and put it up for my motivation. A lot of people at work have been using this website to help with this get fit journey. It is great! I put in how much weight I want to lose (15 pounds) and the date by which I want it to be a distant memory, lol. They formulated how many calories I should eat and provided me with fat, carb, and protein guidelines. I can keep track of how much water I'm drinking (don't laugh, but I just realized that 8ounces is the same as 1 cup. I was getting upset because I couldn't drink 8 glasses of water...my glass holds 24ounces. I'm an idiot). They also give you a fitness plan. How many calories you need to burn a week and different ways you can do it. I do much more exercise than they say so I guess I can expect the weight to come off a little before the goal I set for myself. Since I've been super open with people hear about my weight (sharing keeps me from being sad about it which certainly won't help me lose it) people have been open with me. This is a blessing and a curse. I have heard some stuff that just seems stupid to me.

 

My officemate (queen of Pepsi and McDonald's) had this conversation with a few of us:

 

Officemate: "Yayyyy I figured out why I wasn't losing weight last time"

Me: Pepsi, McDonald's and that laziness in the gym you called working out?

Group: "Oh wow, why?"

Officemate: "I wasn't eating enough calories for my weight"

Group: "really?"

Me: now this don't sound no type of right. you need to eat more to lose more? how do anorexics do it?

Officemate: "Yeah, I was only eatin 1,200 calories a day and I need 1,700 for my weight"

Group: "ohhh, mmhhhmmm"

Me: don't nobody have anything to say? What the heezy hay kinda foolishness is this? Y'all know she lying right? Her lunches were 1,200 calories, she never only got 1,200 calories in a day, goodness, my greedy but can barely stick to that. Somebody say something. SOMEBODY!!!!!

 

Nobody said anything and my brain was just flying a mile a minute. She also said that somebody told her that if she burns a certain amount of calories a day she can eat what she wants. I was like, yeah, if you're Michael Phelps. But alas, she has been eating her McDonald's breakfast (gotta get those calories in) and drinking her Pepsi (not diet, we need more calories!) and wondering why she can't sleep at night.

 

Hmm, maybe that's why I can't lose weight, I'm all up in her business. Off to mind my own and work on my own goals. I'll update y'all at the end of the month of any progress (ohhh and there  better be some to report or I'm subscribing the Officemate Method of Weight Loss).

2009 Church Catchphrase

Thanks for your help yesterday! TheCount and I want to hang with our nieces and nephews more, but those kids think we have a money tree somewhere. I wanted to take them to the circus, but there are 4 of them  now (we took 3 before and it got quite pricey). So we would have to drive an hour to get them (in a borrowed truck, because they can't fit in our car), pay for 6 circus tickets, any snacks and/or toys that they want, and since they will probably want to spend the night, food for multiple meals, and then get them back home and return the borrowed truck with gas in it. For an 11 year old girl, two 10 year old boys, and a 3 year old boy, that is mighhhtttyyyy expensive. We don't have kids yet cuz we can't afford them, ours or anybody elses. We have taken them out before (shopping, out to eat, getting our nails done, for their haircuts, or lock maintenance, the circus, just hanging out) and the mother (TheCount's sis-n-law [his brother passed away]) never offers any money, even if they call us and ask us can they hang with us. I feel bad asking her to send at least $20 (total) to cover some food, especially since she still owes me $100 that I'll probably never see again...I figure, if she wanted to pay, she would, and clearly she doesn't. If she doesn't have the money, that's fine, but don't tell me "you got me" when you don't (and then show up with 5 new tattoos). It's sad because we want to hang with them more, but we just aren't able to cover everything all the time.

**********

I had another question I wanted to ask yesterday but I was wayyyyy too embarrassed, so I tried to ask my momma:

Me: Ma, I have a problem

Ma: Is it financial?

Me: What? Girl, no!

Ma: Ok, then proceed

Me: Well......insert problem here dealing with girlie things

Ma: Well uhhh, I don't know nothing about that, but maybe you're going to have a birth control baby, I keep telling you, a lot of your cousins were conceived while their mommas were on the pill

Me: I aint having no baby!

**********

Anywayyyyyyy, last night we went to Bible study and I noticed something. There are a few people at church that you always know  are there. When the pastor is preaching, instead of just saying mmhmm, or nodding their head in agreement, or standing up as if to say 'you betta go head pastor', or a simple Amen, they have a signature line. There is this older Caribbean woman who always bellows out "that's true, that's true" and an older man that always says "thank you Abba Father." They crack me up. Don't even get me started on the man that screams Hallelujah! all loud (but not while the pastor is preaching, he does it when we are greeting first time visitors or watching the announcements, lol). Yesterday we sat in front of a young lady that just kept remarking, "that is so good, so good," but she wasn't loud or anything, so it was cool. One Sunday a couple of months ago there was this man kept on hollering "I once was blind but now I see," like over and over. I couldn't see who it was so after service I asked a friend

 

Me: Who was hollering during service? Why didn't any of the deacons go over and pray with him (if it seems as if somebody is going through something or if they are being a bit "extra" our deacons will go over and pray with them, you can't just be distracting folks like you the only one in the sanctuary. If you wanna talk, buy the cd or dvd and do it at home)?

Patrice: It was the blind man!

Me: astonished Oh wow! He can see now?

Patrice: looking at me like I was the dumb one No, he's still blind.

Me: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

I don't know why but I fell out laughing, TheCount said God was going to reduce the size of my mansion in heaven for laughing at that man, but come on, that was funny!

 

The point of this was, I decided I want a signature line. I tried out a few last night, everybody vote for your favorite or suggest your own:

 

Pastor: How are we going to try to win people to Christ when we all broke down and sick and our kids acting a fool and our marriages falling apart? Huh?

Me:  Sho nuff!

~~later on~~

 

Pastor: We need to be examples of God's glory in the earth, so that people will see how great our God is!

Me: Show ya right!

 

~~later-er on~~

 

Pastor: Now let's give God a shout of praise!

Me: Whoodie Whooooooo

 

Those were the lines I tried last night. TheCount wasn't feeling any of them, but we all know he is a hater! Now I turn to you, what should be my 2009 church catchphrase?

 

A. Sho nuff!

B: Show ya right!

C. Whoodie Whoooo

 

**disclaimer, I really do pay attention in church y'all. I take good notes and I apply the messages, I promise!**

Help Me Please!

Alright, once again I have a few questions for you guys. Normally I just google things, but these aren't really googleable. I want some real answers from some real people.

 

1. When you send your kids out with someone, do you send money as well? Does it differ if they are going out with a friend's family or their own family? What about if an aunt/uncle decides they want to take your child(ren) to the circus, would you send money or does an offer to take your child out  mean that they want to foot the bill?

 

2. My mom wanted my cousin to come over. He said he couldn't because he didn't have any gas and didn't get paid until the next day. So does that mean he runs out of money between paychecks? Do you (or somebody you know) regularly run out of money between pay periods? Doesn't this mean that they are constantly living above their means? When I was in college I knew that at any given time I may get swamped with school work and have to take some time off from my job, because of this I always kept a minimum of 3 paychecks in my checking account (ummmm so what if each paycheck was only like $150, lol). Do you keep an amount in your account that you don't let yourself go under?

 

3. If you have ever been on a weight loss program or were trying to lose weight, did you keep track of what you were eating and plug it into a calorie counter? I just started and I almost cried last night when I realized what was sabotaging my weight loss goal. I was seriously on track for my day and a handful of sugar roasted pecans blew me out of the water, I am sooo over that phase in life. They're good, but not that good, I need my pants to fit again!

 

4. When you paint your nails, what type of Top Coat do you use? How long does it take your nails to dry? It seems as though when I use a top coat my nails never dry, I wake up with smudges and such and it aint cute. When I don't use a top coat my polish is receding within a day. I never have smudges or issues with my toe nail polish, only my hands...what gives?

 

If all the questions don't apply to you, please answer the ones that do! I really need an honest answer for 1 & 2, because I'm trying to figure out how to handle some situations, I'm not trying to get in your business or anything, lol.

Cook Off!

Since TheCount and I both stayed home yesterday, we had a day free to do whatever we wanted. I actually got TheCount out to run some errands with me. We slipped and slid our way to the wal.mart a mile from our house (the snow plow people really had not done a good job around where we lived). TheCount gets a nervous twitch when watching me spend money. It's like dude, we have to eat, and we have to wipe ourselves after using the bathroom. Food and tissue are not negotiable! He kept asking, what's this for? What you going to do with that? Well honey, this is called smoked sausage, I'm going to put it in my spaghetti. These are diced tomatoes, I am going to make my sauces with them. This is bread, it is used for sandwiches and toast. Count, meet tissue, I use this every single time I use the bathroom. It needs to be of good quality. He stressed me out so bad I forgot he said I could buy a better vacuum yesterday and didn't realize until we were back in the house that I forgot to get it. We also went to the grocery store to get fresh produce.

 

Count: Why we going to the grocery store?

Me: For food

Count: Didn't we just get food?

Me: Did you see any fresh fruits or vegetables in our basket?

Count: Ok, so we are going in for fresh fruits and veggies? Then we're done?

Me: We're going in for what I say we're going in for! If I decide to turn cartwheels up and down the cereal aisle, you will stand and wait till I'm done. Goodness, why you ask so many questions man?

Count: Excuse me if I want to make sure we have a game plan and you aren't luring me to my death.

 

Uggghhh, dude is impossible. All throughout the grocery store I had to explain myself. Even when our bill got cut in half after coupons and sales his ungrateful self was like, well it's not savings because you still spent money ($11). If the ground wasn't covered in snow I would have ran off and sped out the parking lot and made him walk home. Glad I didn't try that because we certainly spun out trying to leave the parking lot.

 

Last night we had a Top Chef cook off. I was a contestant and the judge. Needless to say, I won. He cheated by using some food he purchased from Pasta Blitz on Saturday. He also kept asking me for help. I kept hollering out "this is a competition, I can't help you!" I made Smoked Sausage Spaghetti and in addition to his purchased food that he put in the oven and claimed he made, he made some rice/sausage/cheese mixture that was gritty as all get out cuz he refused to follow the directions for the rice. Maybe when my sister comes home we will get her to photograph or film our show. We had so much fun and there was stuff everywhere, he had to turn the top of the dryer into a food prep station and all the plastic bags from our store run were in the middle of the floor. Chaos and food, I love it! 

 

Do you and your S/O go shopping together? Do y'all cook together?

No work for TM or TheCount!

This weekend I spent a lot of time with TheCounts friends. It's a good thing I like those dudes! On Friday I spent my ride home driving through neighborhoods looking at dream homes. It was so fun! I found the perfect neighborhood for me, a horse community! I was driving through and I was like wait a minute...they have a horse in their backyard. I was just cheesing as I drove through as I told myself, "I found my new home!" When we get a couple million dollars in the bank, I am getting one of those houses, surprisingly, not one home was for sale in that neighborhood.

On Saturday we woke up and went to the Amish Market. Since we went so late, it was packed and all we got were some pretzels and then we rolled out. I asked TheCount if he thought they would sell my roasted pecans. Shoot, my sugar roasted pecans can launch us into millionaire status! We went over to visit his friend that's getting married in May at work. They were up in veri/zon talking trash and goofing around, which led to a video game challenge that night at our house. Since TheCount realized all of his friends would probably be coming over, he took me to a mall I had never been to to appease me. Y'all I got 4opi nail polishes and a headband for $11! I can find a bargain anywhere, lol. All of his friends came over that night and we had a smorgasboard of Chipotle, Cosi, McDonald's, Pasta Blitz, and Subaway, lol. I went into the bedroom while they played their games. When I woke up I found these greedy dudes went and got a gallon of ice cream and a tub of cookies. Know what they left at our house? A gallon of ice cream and a tub of ice cream, why do they want me to be fat????

Oh yeah, we went back to the mall with his friends so it was me and 4 dudes. Since I hang with good looking guys the girlies were all up in their faces and mugging in mine (like little girls, lol. The ones that were actually age appropriate weren't worried about me). But the kicker was, I kept seeing girls in the mall with bonnets on. Like the ones you sleep in. Is this a new trend I'm not aware of? This chick had the nerve to side eye me. I was like ummmmm, who are you side eyeing at the mall in your finest bedtime gear? These dudes definitely aint checking for you. All of their girlfriends must go through me, and hanging at the mall looking ready for bed is a huge no no!

Last night I was texting with one of his friends about the ill.umi.nati and wit.ches and wiz.ards. We were having some good conversation! His friend is a conspiracy theorist like none other! After a while I was like, well look, I'm just going to plead the blood of Jesus and keep on going about my business. I don't have time to be walking around thinking that every di.sney movie is about mi.nd con.trol and that Hil.ary Cli.nton and Bi.lly Gra.ham are part of a huge conspiracy theory. Seriously folks, you'll go crazy researching that stuff (although it was entertaining). He said he's going to keep studying up on it and then let me know what he finds.

Today we are having a snow day!!!!! I may go in later (although I doubt it!) just for the sake of going. It is really coming down although it is nowhere near the 6-10 inches they said we were going to get, but hey, I'll take an inch or 4 if it means nobody expects me to be at work.

Did it snow where you are? Are you taking a chill day?