Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Wedding Wednesday

Last week I asked if you would be offended if you got invited to the ceremony but not the reception. This is why I asked: people keep inviting themselves to my wedding! They are people that I interact with so they naturally assume that they are coming to the wedding and reception and that's the problem. I searched high and low for a venue to hold at least 250ppl for a reception that wasn't crazy expensive (I am not about to break the bank for a few hours of food). When people hear 250ppl they assume that I'm having it that big so I can invite everybody I know....wrong! The Count and I have huge families. With just family (great aunts and uncles, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins) it's about 150-175 people. These people are blood related and whether we like them all or not, they will be at our wedding and traveling from Virginia, North Carolina, Georgia, Arkansas, California, Jamaica, and New York so obviously I want to have a decent reception as a small thanks for travelling to see me get married. After family we can invite 75-100 more people and that space was taken up quickly by our parents friends that have known and been apart of our lives since we were born and then lastly our friends. Honestly we had to fight to get enough spaces for our friends! So why do people that I used to work with keep giving my sister their address so I can mail their invitation. Why are casual acquaintances from church coming up to us talking about where is the reception. How come every time we go to a cookout this summer with old friends/acquaintances they talk about how they are going to cut up at our reception. News flash guys: YOU AREN'T GOING TO BE THERE! I don't say it to mean, I say it to let you know so you don't have to clear you schedule. My mom prepared a script for me to say:
"We both have large families so the reception will be family members and out of town guests."

I hate hurting peoples feelings but seriously I cannot afford nor do I have the desire to entertain everybody that ever knew me! You wanna know what really irritates me? To me, the most important part is the ceremony. You know the part where we make a covenant with God. The part where we pledge to be faithful to each other forever no matter what. I honestly enjoy ceremony's more than receptions because I love seeing people commit to each other, I'm honored that I can witness that (my ugly crying face is proof of that). If we are close and I neglect to invite you to the reception, by all means be upset with me, that is fine. Don't buy me a gift, don't come to the shower, but if you really loved me, you wouldn't miss seeing me get married, it's only happening once.

You want to know something else that is bothering me about this wedding planning stuff? When people tell me what I have to do. The quickest way to make sure I don't do something is to tell me I have to, I won't do it just to prove you wrong. Our reception is a reflection of us, so guess what we're going to do, whatever the heck we want! If you don't like it, don't come! We'll invite somebody else. We don't have to do a first dance, we've only danced together once in our lives and it was the last dance at prom. If you would shut up for one second I would explain that we are going to dance our way out of the reception off to our hotel to the same song. We don't have to have drinking and dancing at our reception. Why? Because we don't drink or dance, again, don't like it, don't come. We are going to have a laid back jazz lounge type of feeling. Sit down, eat your food, and talk to the people at your table. You want to drink and dance, go out after you leave OUR party. I don't tell you what to do at your events don't tell me what to do at mine. And I don't eat cake, yes we will have one, no I will not put it in my mouth for the picture. It is disgusting, it makes my stomach churn. If you let me spit it out in your hand, then I will consider putting it in my mouth.

I really am enjoying this experience, I guess I needed to vent. Feel free to disagree, I like to hear varying points of view. If you think I sound like an idiot or a selfish bride PLEASE tell me (The Count and my mom have threatened to call Bridezilla on me, they were joking, I think).


Nerd Girl said...

I love it! Of course, that's because you sound a lot like me when I was planning our wedding!

I did and had what I wanted that fit within my budget, and really wasn't too concerned with the "have-tos" and "traditions." Whatever.

We had cake - but only because my husband wanted cake. My dessert? Peach cobbler.

You are so right in that the ceremony and the vows you take before God are the most important part!

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